Apparently, last night in New York there was a "concert" by a "band" called Phish. For those of you who wash your hair regularly and believe in things like soap, Phish is a bunch of ugly, scruffy dudes who have mastered playing the same song over and over again and are thus worshipped by stoners who haven't yet figured out that a) Jerry Garcia died a while back, b) Trey Anastasio is not Jerry Garcia, and c) it is not actually the 1960s, and it is stupid to romanticize a period in history you didn't actually fucking live in.
Once in college I very briefly dated this dude who was into Phish. (He was also into some band called The String Cheese Incident, a name that clearly only some people who were baked out of their minds would ever have thought was clever.) He and his friends would do this shit where one of them would put on a Phish live CD that they recorded off a recording of some show somebody's cousin's friend totally went to, and within the first five notes one of them would be like "Oh, this is August 7, 2000 in Tacoma" or "This is totally March 22, 1998 in Wichita" and the other hippies would be all "Yeah, dude, that show was so amazing," even though they never fucking went to it.
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